Pros & Cons of Intergenerational Relationships
Pros & Cons of Intergenerational Relationships by Jay Stewart
GayLifeAfter40.com recognizes that gay relationships come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. None of us chooses to be gay and but we certainly can choose whom we date and fall in love with. Because of this ..sometimes this results in intergenerational relationships that have both their benefits and concerns. GayLifeAfter40.com wants to break down the pros and cons of intergenerational relationships where a prominent age gap exists between the two guys.
Pro: Invigorate and Energize Your Life
There’s nothing more exciting than finding a strong connection with somebody. By dating outside your age, you’re liable to find somebody with vastly different experiences and opinions than yours. Whether you’re the younger or the older, intergenerational gay dating is the place to be. The younger can introduce you to some of the newest clubs on the scene, while the older can take him out for a night of classic cuisine that never ages.
Con: The Allure of Taboo
As gay men, we’ve already entered into a so-called taboo. Be mindful of gay dating someone in another age category strictly for the allure of taboo. If you’re younger and seeking a sugar daddy, your gay relationship is likely not going to work. If you’re older and seeing a young servant, again, don’t be surprised if it doesn’t make it passed a few dates.
Pro: Not Settling
Too often, we seek relationships of comfort. We date those that we meet through friends that are usually close to our own age. But this doesn’t result in a long term commitment for some of us. Why not break free from the past and liven up your future? Show everyone that you’re not willing to settle for another failed gay dating adventure. Pick up that person at the bar that’s nothing like what you’ve gone for before.
Con: Society’s Judgment
Society loves to wag their finger and place judgment. This definitely applies to intergenerational relationships. They see two men in a gay relationship that are clearly not the same age and begin to make and/or think various rude comments. Potentially, they’re going to see the younger one as having Daddy issues or trying to act grown up. As for the older, they’ll see him as being immature or a cradle robber.
Pro: Connecting on Common Ground
There’s nothing more exciting than basing a relationship on common ground instead of age. Ignore the judgment of friends and allow them to bask in your amazing relationship. Once, they see you in your gay relationship, they’ll know exactly why you two are together. They’ll see the many interesting common interests that you have. These can involve anything from: traveling, dining, gaming, exercising, dancing, etc. It’s your right to enjoy gay dating whomever you like. If it turns into a relationship, then that is even better.
Con: Performing Prescribed Roles
Occasionally, intergenerational gay relationships can fall into performing prescribed roles. For example, the younger is the submissive one and the older is the dominant one. The older may control the finances and begin dictate how the younger can spend their time. Likewise, the older feels they must control the younger to ensure that they are fulfilling their role as the wise one.
Pro: Extended Social Circles
One of the best parts of gay dating someone from a different generation is getting to extend your own social circles. It’s likely that the two of you have vastly different acquaintances, friends, and work contacts. By entering into this gay relationship, you’ve now potentially added a ton of new friendships. Now there’s the opportunity to put together fun dinner events, weekend getaways, and house parties. Each get together now features a mix of yours and his most interesting friends.
Con: Future Reality
While an intergenerational gay relationship may work for you today, what about 10, 20, or even 30 years from now? Gay dating a different age is fun and all, but a relationship may mean serious commitment. If you’re younger, are you prepared for potentially caring for your partner in their old age? If you’re older, are you willing to watch them make some of the mistakes that you made. Once lust turns to love, there’s more at stake than excitement, there’s a future to consider.
Personally, those of us here at GayLifeAfter40.com pass no judgment on the type of relationship that you have. Gay dating is an opportunity to go out and connect with whomever that you want. At some point, you may enter into an intergenerational gay relationship. We want you and your partner to review this article, discuss the merits of each pro and con, and then decide what is best for your own relationship.
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