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5 Reasons Why I Became a Cheater


By Michael Pollack

Okay… I admit …I cheated in my relationship. I am not proud of it at all.  I am not perfect. I really feel I made a huge  mistake. At the time, I had no self control. It was an inner drive in me to do it despite what my inner ego told me not to do it. I should have just worked on the relationship and actually talked about my frustrations.

I am not sure if he ever found out because we are not together anymore and I was afraid to ask.  We just drifted apart further in our relationship that it was best just to end it .

Upon reflection, I feel guilty about the whole incident and that kind of guilt definitely weighed heavy on the relationship and it probably was the sign that our relationship was dissolving anyways and the cheating was the precursor.

But what bothers me is that I sacrificed my  honor—and my partner’s honor—for bullshit. I came from a family where both parents were married for over 50 years.

There is a saying that “Once a cheater, always a cheater,”  I don’t believe that because I know I wouldn’t do that now. I have grown and it was a different  part of my life back then.

Upon reflection, I can only give you the reasons.  They are not really excuses but if you think they are, then believe what you believe. I wanted you to be aware of them so you won’t make the same mistake that I made because in the end it was not worth it.

The 5 Reasons Why I Became a Cheater

1) I wanted revisit my youth.

I wanted to be the younger person that I once was so I could feel young again. I chose a guy that was younger than  me.

2) I wanted a distraction from Reality,

I was  stressed out from work and in life. I needed a diversion.

3) Satisfy sexual curiosity

I wanted to experiment with sex without my partner because I didn’t want to be laughed at or say he wouldn’t allow me to do certain things that  always fantazixed doing . It was my private time.

4) I liked The “thrill of the chase

The fact that you “can” have another man and the idea of “forbidden fruit” is sometimes too sexy and titillating to pass up. Temptation and the thought of just being naughty felt good at the time.

5) The desire to feel important or special (an ego boost). 

It was nice to  get that undivided attention. The grass is not always greener. It just seem so at the time. My ex is now with another man..it was too late to go back.

Monogamy and exclusive relationships aren’t for everyone. But, if you’ve made promises, stick to them, or have the common courtesy to close one chapter before starting another. That way, everyone can keep their honor and integrity… and move on.  You may ask why write about it if the relationship ended and he never found out about it? Because I know he never cheated and I should have just broke up instead of doing something behind his back. He deserved better.  In the end, I could have listed the reasons and utilized them in my relationship instead of cheating…maybe the relationship would have gotten better and we would still be together. Something to think about…

I am glad that I am moving and Aging Forward in life! I hope this helps someone out there that maybe struggling.


Did You Know?

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Many of us at our age  are driven by a deep knowing that we were born for a certain reason. Maybe, you feel that your life is not totally fulfilled yet , and you have  decided that you don’t want to waste your time anymore. If not now, when will you actually lead a more fulfilling life or get help with a problem that you may have carried with you for over 20 years? But  your heart and soul must be invested in the process in order to be effective. If you’re not ready to take bold action, please wait until you are before hiring us..

If you’re ready to age forward and begin your own transformation and your heart and soul are saying, “ Lets Do this!” ,  I hope you’ll take the leap with us and contact us at will@gaylifeafter40.com



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